I Feel a Big [Picture] Dump Comin' On.

It's Spring! You know what that means: sun, leaves, and sidewalks--but mostly pictures.

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Oldest First: St. Patrick's Day in Minneapolis with SLPeeps.

My John Deere-Green-n-Gold Jake's shirt matches well with Guinness-Black.

Sal discovered her new favorite drink through Mal. The bottom half is Blue Moon; the top is Guinness. Mal called it an Eclipse, but they call it a Black-n-Blue at Blue Bricks. Both are excellent names, but I don't think anyone will ever convince me to put a God damned slice of orange in my Guinness.

Dorn on the left, Grant on the right. Both are hard-fucking-core. Those of you who haven't met Grant yet might recognize his hot pocket and sweaty rascals. Notice his clearly pre-destined 'stache just dyin' to take over.

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Chess

Things of late in the office have taken a turn for the nerdly. There's been a lot of chess. A lot. Once chess became the new Facebook, I couldn't resist an urge I had around Xmas time. Ya see, DJ T-Money asked for a chess set this year. Perfect. A nice easy present that I could even enjoy with him. I found Chess 4 at River Hills Mall and it took all my willpower (and a fierce Amanda) to not buy two sets. Things were cool for a couple months until Phil and Naughtilie started playing chess in the office. Fuckers.

After getting whomped that one time, I finally destroyed Clock last week. All it took was Gunmetal, Vanilla, and Stout to take his Goldenrod army down. Now Clock can't even tell time. He's my most proud trophy on my mantle (read as: chalk rail behind desk).

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Thesis Reading

Nathan and I unconsciously decided on both of us looking eville for our all-time smash hit classic duo thesis reading.

Who doesn't like a good dick-joke?

Number Seven on my To Accomplish Before Graduation List: Project the word fuckin' on a giant screen in front of 40 people, including distinguished scholars, beloved friends and colleagues, and some Random Crazy Broad who asked more questions than my thesis committee combined.

Pappa Davis doesn't need to ask questions, though. The most important recurring question he's ever asked me is, "What's at stake?" The second most important recurring question was asked during the Q&A session after the readings. Jer asked where and when we'd be drinking.

Of course, Pub 500, where we always have a good time.

But even when I have to go there, I'm always really at Blue Bricks.

See how much happier people are at Blue Bricks?

I mean, look at this dude! The first thing I thought when I saw him was, "Man! That guy needs some elboobs!"

These ladies couldn't resist. Like, I mean he probably woulda done bad stuff to them if they had.

My fav type of shot. Sal and I have a ho-gillion of these.

Yeah. Pretty standard, Phil.

Motherfucker's so smart, makes my head shrink.

When my head shrinks I get good ideas like, "I know, I'll teach Sal how to walleye."

How quickly the student...

...becomes master.

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I leave you with Pappa Davis' road rash. He caught me taking pictures of Clock and Chess in my office. When seeing my delicious camera phone, he asked, "Would you take a picture of my arm?"

The front wheel of one of his bikes came off at 30 mph. So I asked, "For like... insurance reasons or something?"

He smiled. "For Static," referring to, of course, the magazine. Don't be surprised if we see a similar Static cover sometime soon.

Mace...out